Inadequate Mothers

There are some who have the incredible privilege of celebrating Mother’s Day with hearts full of gratitude and many happy memories. There are others for whom this day is an ache, because the woman who birthed them was incapable (for as many reasons as there are incapable mothers) of loving and caring for a child as one should be. Even moms can only be who they are.

I am in the latter group; I had an incapable mother.

That, along with my own failings makes me an inadequate mother.

But, three wondrous people call me “Mom” and I want them to be in that first group. As one who had to come to terms with a mom who was not suited to motherhood, I approach motherhood with both awe and joy: children are an unspeakable gift not all are able to have. I have been blessed far more than I deserve. Loving my children is as effortless as breathing, but raising them to be people of integrity and kindness and grace despite the inevitable pains childhood and real life brings is…really freakin’ hard; attempting it as best I can is the most wonderful privilege of my life.

I’m so glad I’ve had help.

Happy Mother’s Day to each woman in my life who has been a much needed and beautiful example to me and my kids. You each have had a part in teaching me and mine to learn and grow and love and play well. Whether you have children of your own or not, you are instrumental in helping me raise mine, and for that I am truly grateful.

Happy Mother’s Day to the fathers and men who stand in the gap when mom can’t be there, physically, emotionally, or otherwise. Maybe because she had an early meeting, is sick, or maybe because she just can’t, for whatever reason.

And, to my three wonders, one of which is…wait for it…making me Mickey Mouse pancakes right now, thank you for being you. ♡

My three wonders

My three wonders

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4 Responses to Inadequate Mothers

  1. Chelly says:

    It’s always the Mothers who believe that there is a “perfect Mom” who feel inadequate. There isn’t any Mother that I know of that hasn’t made mistakes or felt that they should have handled things differently. But I know one thing 100% and that is you are an amazing Mother. Your children come first. You love them more than anything. You have raised the most amazing children that I love and adore. You, my friend, ARE AN OUTSTANDING MOM! Give yourself some credit!

    • rodalena says:

      I think every mom feels inadequate sometimes, because the responsibility is so great and the love is so vast. Thank you, Chelly, for being one of the people who has been an invaluable encouragement and support to me. I am so glad my kids know you, and have been influence by your amazing spirit. <3

  2. nancy says:

    Awww love those kiddos and you dearly ❤

  3. laf4ever says:

    I love this. Thanks Rodalena.

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